Networking Knowhow: Be Interested, Not Interesting
Posted by Melissa Galt in Business Development, Internet Marketing, Marketing Strategies, Networking
Like many professionals, I don’t love networking. After all, too often, it is one letter away from not working! But I have learned how to make it easy and effective over the years.
First, what networking isn’t about:
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Collecting business cards, only to put these in some box in your office never to be looked at again.
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Free food, since you really need to keep your hands clean and available for meeting others and taking notes.
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A chance to catch up with colleagues you see rarely, save that for lunch or coffee.
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Getting more names to add to your ezine list, you only get to do this if you have actual PERMISSION from each person. Don’t assume it.
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Trolling for a date (fortunately, I’ve never experienced this, but I hear it is somewhat popular today!)
Instead what networking is about:
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Being interested in others first and finding out how you can serve and support their success.
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Making selected connections that you follow up on soon after and repeatedly. Success depends on your ability to be consistent and persistent.
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Scheduling coffee or lunch with both those colleagues you want to catch up with and new associates whom you want to get to know better.
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Paying it forward. When you support others in their success whether that takes the form of you providing valued connections for them, or even becoming a benefactor of their service or product yourself, you create the opportunity for RECIPROCITY. They have an unspoken obligation and in most cases desire to do the same for you.
When you network, imagine that you are at your own party and certainly at your own gathering you wouldn’t make it about you (would you?) Instead you’d focus on everyone else, and how to make them comfortable. Ask what connections they are looking for? Who is their ideal prospect? What target market do they work with? You aren’t grilling them, this isn’t an interview. You are finding out their key points of connection and then you’ll introduce them to someone else and keep moving.
Networking can be anxiety causing when you think it is all about you. Focus on the other person long enough to learn relevant facts and consider how you can connect them. When asked (and you will be asked) share your key points and let them know what a good connection for you is. Be interested first, then interesting.
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Janet
Thanks, Melissa, for covering so much so concisely. Your final point about anxiety stemming from it being a me-centered conversation is so true. Great tips!
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Chuck Balcher
I like your positive attitude for meeting people and fostering positive ways to grow your business.
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Linda Menesez, MSW, LCSW
Thank you, Melissa, for such simple words of wisdom. Your message is clear and concise, and much needed by many business people. As you said, networking is about forming connections, which you can then nurture into ongoing relationships as time goes by. If your entire focus is on yourself and what you want, it certainly is going to be a very short-term connection, and one filled with much anxiety for you.
Linda
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Lisa Rothstein
Hi Melissa,
I absolutely agree…but i have to say I am one of the exceptions: I met my husband at a networking meeting 3 years ago! (I also made several profesisonal contacts that night, so it was a very productive evening
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Linda Turner
Thanks for the great tips Melissa, you always come through with great information. I love the tip about trolling for a date. I’ll remember to keep that in mind on my next social networking meetup LOL just kidding.
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Norbridge Antiques
Thank you for breaking down the concept of networking into the simplest terms that we can all understand and keep in mind.
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Sharon Eden
Some time ago I decided the focus for my networking was ‘rich conversations and relationship’. Ever since I’ve had the pleasure of experiencing just that!
Excellently and succinctly put, Melissa. I’ll certainly be pointing some of my clients to your blog.
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joi mitchell
This info is so helpful and very useful since I’ll be attending a networking event this week! I’m a little anxious but some of these tips will help me get through it. thx!
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Sylvia
“focus on the other person…and consider how you can connect them.” Love that insight! It’s not about how THEY can connect YOU, but about how YOU can connect THEM. An aha moment for me. Thank you!
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Deborah Stewart
Melissa, you’ve hit the nail on the head! Excellent advice. I learned long ago that networking is about giving, not about getting. Thanks for your wisdom.
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Stephen Welton
There’s some amazing things that can happen when people committed to helping each other network with a common goal of helping one another achieve their success. I might just have the perfect tool for entrepreneurs to use to follow up. These are some really great tips to get you going. You really just have to take your focus off yourself to win. How to win friends and influence people is a great read and may be a novel of choice to add to your library. What’s your ideal client look like?
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